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Self-love is key to true confidence. When you derive validation from within, and not from others, you feel more secure and happy. But getting to a point of self-love can seem like a difficult journey. When you realise that it takes baby steps and an ability to forgive yourself despite your imperfections, you start seeing things differently.

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Here are some ways you can start learning to love yourself.

Stop trying to be perfect

Let go of the idea of perfection. Understand that it doesn’t exist. Should you strive to be a better you? Definitely. But understand that life is a mix of both good and bad experiences. When you adopt this mindset, you release the pressure on yourself and increase your ability to blossom.

Learn to say no

People who practise self-love can set boundaries even when it feels uncomfortable. Being able to say no prevents you from doing things you won’t be happy doing, which is key to a productive and happy life. Start practising the art of saying no. A friend invites you to a party when you have work to do? Politely decline.

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Do things you like

The best way to recognise your potential is to do things you like. These could be things you enjoy doing or things you’re good at. When you do things you love, not only do you get more fulfilment out of life, but you also begin to trust yourself more because of the things you can accomplish.

See a therapist

Sometimes it is difficult to love ourselves when we’ve been in a toxic relationship, had a traumatic childhood, or had other issues that can be difficult to break away from. This is where the help of a professional can be beneficial. If you are having negative thoughts that are preventing you from getting the most out of life, then it is worth it to get accessed by a therapist. With the help of one, you can confront these thoughts and put an end to them for good.

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Take out some time from your day to live in the moment

You’ve probably heard about the importance of being mindful or meditation. As cliche as it sounds, being mindful (or being in the present moment) is a powerful way to put your mind at ease. When you live in the moment, you don’t judge anything. Instead, you focus on what matters, which is NOW.

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This article was first published on 15th April 2022


My name is Samuel Okoruwa. I am an ardent researcher, reading is life and writing is fun.

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