Being assertive in our present world, where people are often cajoled to make choices based on popular opinion and against their wish can be very extraordinary. Assertive people take their stand and speak up without being aggressive, yet pass their information clearly and in a refined manner. Assertiveness speaks about one’s
self-esteem.
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Not everyone is assertive. People are often cowed to keep quiet, maybe on the account of gender, race, class, and so on. People are silenced even when they are right. In this article, we shall look at 5 power habits that can make you assertive.
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Understand The True Meaning Of Assertiveness
When the meaning of a thing is not known abuse is inevitable. Many people often mistake being aggressive as being assertive. They can’t tell the difference between being assertive and being aggressive. They become loud in a bid to stand up for themselves. On the other hand, people think being assertive is being rebellious, or disrespectful. However, being assertive is an interpersonal skill that speaks of confidence, and the ability to stand up for oneself while respecting the rights of others. It is all about knowing what you want and communicating it effectively.
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Choose The Right Words, Tone, And Body Language
Communication is an all-around affair. When you are being assertive watch your language, choose your words wisely, your tone must be humane, calm, and temperance. Furthermore, your body language must show that you’re willing to engage rather than confront or argue. If you’re bothered about an issue or uncomfortable about a matter, speak up with a standing posture, a bright and welcoming facial expression, and a calm tone. Don’t sound accusative and blaming.
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Remain Open-minded
Being assertive does not mean being opinionated or a difficult nut to crack or insisting you’re right and others are wrong. You must understand and accept differences. You must appreciate the fact that we all come from different backgrounds and don’t necessarily think the same or have the same worldview. When experiencing differences with people, this shouldn’t make you angry, rather seek common ground while communicating your mind.
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Use “I” Rather Than “You”
Using “I” rather than “you” has a great effect on communicating your message. It means you’re taking responsibility and are acknowledging the fact that you’re aware of what you want and you want to see that there’s a place for common understanding. For example, when being assertive, you can say, “I think”, “I believe”, “I feel”, rather than saying, “you never”, ” you always”. Assertiveness is all about communicating your mind without sounding accusative, confrontational, and aggressive.
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Set Boundaries
Setting boundaries as an assertive person means you’re guided by principles and values. These principles and values will define the people you hang around with, and the communication you get involved in. Boundaries define what you can and can’t tolerate, and act accordingly, rather than getting involved in so many associations that might need you to always defend yourself. Furthermore, your boundaries let you see red flags ahead of time and help you avoid them.
Featured Image Source: Florida Behavioral Health
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This article was first published on 25th October 2021
nnaemeka-emmanuel
Nnaemeka is an academic scholar with a degree in History and International Studies from the University of Nigeria, Nsukka. He is also a creative writer, content creator, storyteller, and social analyst.
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