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640_rejection-letter   Everyone faces rejection at one point in time of their lives. It could range from rejection in a relationship, socially,in a pursuit of a career, or within family. Whichever way, rejection always feels the same; it hurts. Rejection tends to make us feelimperfect, unworthy, unlovable, discouraged, befuddled, angry,and sad.Often times it can also cause us to be reclusive and bogged down in a pit of self-criticism. Sometimes we may be prepared for it and this can help take the edge off of the feeling. Most times however, we are not. This is where attitude comes in. A positive attitude is the first step towards dealing with being rejected. Once you apply an attitude adjustment, going through the following tips are sure to be easy. Acknowledge the feeling: When you feel rejected, the right thing to do is to be honest with yourself about it. Don’t try to shrug off the hurt or act like it’s not painful. Take note of how intense your feelings are. Did this rejection upset you a lot or just slightly? Cry if you want to — it’s a natural way to release emotion. Whatever you do, just don’t bottle up what or how you feel. Give yourself time to grieve if necessary but don’t over-do it. Don’t dwell on the issue: Now that you’ve acknowledged the rejection, it’s time to take steps to move on. Make sure you don’t flog the matter to death and spend days sitting in your house wallowing in your misery. That will only make you feel worse in the long run. The more you dwell on it, the bigger it will become and the more you’ll feel like you can never succeed. Know that it isn’t always personal: Being rejected can sometimes make you feel less of yourself. But often times, people turn you down based on reasons that haveabsolutely nothing to do with you or your capabilities; in fact, it’s often because the situation at that particular time doesn’t work for them. It’s simply life and things won’t always go your way. Get occupied with other fun stuff: This sure helps you let off steam. Since what you focus on gets bigger and what you don’t diminishes, a smart move will be to occupy yourself with things you love to do and with time you won’t even remember the rejection. Talk to someone you trust: Putting feelings into words and expressing yourself to someone is another effective means of handling rejection. If you do consider this option, pick someone who will not only listen but also be supportive. It can be reassuring to know that someone understands what you’re going through and how it feels. Don’t stop trying: When you get turned down, as you most certainly will at some point of your life, don’t give up. Pick up the pieces and try again. If you were turned down because of something you were lacking, take up the challenge and set out to improve yourself or work on that flaw. More opportunities will come around and chances are you will be the better for it. If you experience rejection, don’t be bitter. Be better. A smart person once said “Every time a door is slammed in your face, just go knocking on other doors. There are no dead ends, just dead ears.” Take rejection seriously enough to make any adjustments that are warranted. But don’t let them override your own sense of who you are. Embrace it and move on; you’ll be just fine.

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This article was first published on 31st May 2014

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