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Samson in the Kingstone Graphic Bible — photo credit: theguardian.com

By Steve Harris Life Strategist Steve Harris presents the first part of a six-part series on the adventures and escapades of Samson in the book of Judges. 1. Hey, I’m Samson and don’t call me Sam and no, I ain’t your son either. #RealScript 2. I’m a Judge and no, I don’t mean one of those guys with a wig and gown. I’m the Head Honcho. #RealScript 3. I’m kinda famous in these parts, ripped a lion into two with my bare hands when I was a teenager. #RealScript 4. Carried the city gates to the top of a hill when some guys from Philly came to lock me down. That was fun! #RealScript 5. Let me tell you about that. #RealScript 6. I’d hung out at the club and took a chic home and some morons wanted to put a cleaver through my cranium. #RealScript 7. They’d locked down the city gates from the outside and waited till morning to kill me. #RealScript 8. Jerks! I carried the damn gates to the top of a hill at night! They knew better than to mess with me after that #RealScript 9. That was hilarious! So. I’m pretty much the Enforcer. Even though Israel is under Philistine occupation #RealScript 10. The rulers of Israel think I’m a trouble maker and the Philistines think I’m a threat. #RealScript 11. Folks wonder how I got this strong. I ain’t no gym rat. #RealScript 12. My mom says she met an Angel before I was born, lol. Don’t buy that, every mom thinks their kid’s special. #RealScript. 13. Though I’ve noticed, every time I’m in some sorta jam, a Spirit gets into me and takes over. #RealScript 14. My folks say its the Spirit of the Lord. Could be. Don’t really understand it. #RealScript 15. So I can’t drink (but I do), can’t get a haircut (that sucks) and I’m on every barbers most wanted list. 16. And every woman in the 10 cities and a 100 mile radius wants me. #RealScript 17. My folks say I’m chosen, sacred, a Nazarite. #RealScript 18. Everyone expects me to behave in a certain ‘spiritual’ way, but that ain’t who I am…all the time. I didn’t ask for this. #RealScript 19. The bar’s too high, they can all go to Sheol and Hades for all I care! #RealScript 20. My folks say I hang out with the wrong crowd and my chics are too racy. #RealScript 21. Though I must confess I do have a certain interest in exotic women. #RealScript 22. Ain’t gonna let anyone cramp my style. They partied hard in their generation, now its my turn. #RealScript 23. Was married once. Lasted a week! She ended up with my best man. #RealScript 24. Don’t laugh. It ain’t funny! #RealScript 25. Lost a lot of pride and money in that relationship. She made a fool of me. #RealScript 26. Ended up torching the fields of Gaza with 300 foxes tied tail to tail. #RealScript 27. Vengeance is a dish best served right out of Sheol’s oven! #RealScript 28. So I’ve got a heck of a lot of responsibility. Keeping the peace and stopping them Philly Raiders from looting us. #RealScript 29. But between you and I, I’m conflicted. #RealScript 30. Sometimes I feel so much of Yahweh and other times, I’m cussing like a sailor & going off with some babes. #RealScript 31. I feel like an ass when it’s all over, but yet, I feel Yahweh calling me back. #RealScript 32. How can I be used by HIM and feel so useless in the same instant? #RealScript 33. Strong like a lion on the outside, but powerless like a pussycat on the inside. #RealScript 34. Holy today, and hanging out with the uncircumcized tomorrow. Do you feel me? #RealScript 34b. Sanctified by Yahweh by dawn’s first light and a Sinner by nightfall. #RealScript 35. Anyways, that’s me reflecting. Enough of that, I’m going across the border tonight. #RealScript 36. I’m off to Gath to have a night on the town with Hazael and the guys. It’s been a week and a half. #RealScript 37. Gath and Ashkelon are the Metropolis of Philistia. These Philly folks are a rowdy bunch, always cussing and always up for a good fight. #RealScript 38. And boy, do we oblige them. Hahahaha! #RealScript 39. And their women… Long, silky hair, blue eyes and a body to die for. And the things they can do to a man are LEGENDARY, trust me, I know! #RealScript Steve Harris is a motivational speaker and chief executive officer of EdgeEcution (pronounced Edge – E- Cution), a management consulting firm that assists clients in gaining competitive edge by enhancing the performance of its people through consulting and training interventions. Learn more at www.iamsteveharris.com, and follow him on Twitter @iamsteveharris