Almost everyone has been served this breakfast called “
Heartbreak”. Many get over it as soon as they got into it, others take some time before they move on, while a select few give so much of themselves to the relationship that they lose themselves in the process of losing the relationship.
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A
relationship in any capacity is one that is full of needs and expectations and so, therefore, the pain from a broken relationship arises from disappointed expectations and unfulfilled needs. How, then, does one deal with the pain of heartbreak?
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Express Yourself
There is a lot of online advocacy that tears are a weakness and people should man up after a breakup. After a heartbreak, it is important to cry because crying gives some sort of catharsis, relieves the mind and relaxes the brain. This is why after crying, people tend to feel lighter, free and more agreeable.
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Identify Yourself
If you have successfully expressed yourself, the next step is to identify yourself and point out, in all honesty, what your needs are. Many people come into relationships with unstated, unconscious but very decisive needs. They place all these expectations on the people they just met and so, moving on from this person that has become a north star is almost impossible.
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Figure The Problem
Now you know what your needs and expectations are, it is time to figure out what went wrong. Was it a stifling need on your part to cling to your partner or a controlling trait that was overbearing on the part of your former partner? Recognising and identifying the root cause of the problem will allow you easily take a redress, forgive yourself, and move on when necessary.
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Forgive Yourself
Even if you were the problem. You have realized this, and you will learn from it. Take a deep breath and forgive yourself. This is the deciding factor; if you’ll be able to move on and make progress. Forgive yourself and make a personal commitment to be better.
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Love Yourself
You cannot give what you do not have. There is some sort of aura that people get from a person who does not love themselves and needs others to validate them. You have to love yourself enough to be able to give love to people without burdening them with expectations. Find hobbies and learn new skills, that way, you can distract your mind from idle thoughts that intend to drag you to depression.
Heartbreaks can be very devastating and leaves a lasting effect on the
mental health of both parties. This is true but not all hope is lost, as you can overcome the pain by following the above steps. With time, you will see how you begin to live a richer, fuller and more vibrant life.
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This article was first published on 2nd July 2021 and updated on July 6th, 2021 at 1:24 am
grace-christos
Grace Christos Is a content creator with a proven track record of success in content marketing, online reputation management, sales strategy, and so much more.
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