You know, I used to wonder why people put up a nonchalant attitude when they are told about what people say/think about them. Some people actually take it like salt over the shoulder when they hear other people’s perception about them and don’t even bother clarifying how true or false those perceptions are. Personally, I don’t care about what people think of me or say about me but I find it hard to understand why anyone will feel confident enough to talk about another person without getting their facts right or getting some clarification from the person as to how genuine the story in question is.
I have met some people who would waste no time in clarifying the how true or false a story about them is. They do not mind going great lengths and if possible causing uproar in the course of clarifying what is being said or spread about them. As much as I do not think that any form of energy or time should be thrown into such drama, I believe that it is always good to set the record straight…but when you think of how many records you have to set straight and how many people you have to meet with to clarify the truth, It seems to me like a complete waste of time. Take a look at these 2 incidents;
I met someone a while back, who confronted me about something she heard I had said concerning an incident. Since I don’t like to dabble in a back and forth conversation with anyone, I told her straight up that I had said that because I was a witness in that incident and she took it upon herself to set me straight by explaining to me what had happened before that incident I witnessed and she also made sure that I
understood that she couldn’t be faulted. I noticed how much she struggled with getting that
‘Innocent’ validation from me. So I had to ask her why she really needed to clarify that with me and she said this to me,
‘Niesha, We live in a very small and selfish world. Everybody thinks of themselves alone and is willing to put the next man down just to climb up the ladder of life. I will not let anybody’s perception prevent me from taking the next step on that ladder. I don’t know who else heard what you might have said but you may have just given someone who could play a key role in my life a terrible perception of me and that is a loss to me, an opportunity that may never happen again. I can’t afford any losses in a small selfish world where we all have very little time. If I can help it, I will clarify everybody’s perception about me’ …..When you think about what she said, she is right about how powerful a negative perception could be.
I had heard some rumours flying around my school about a male colleague and I. As always, I don’t care what anyone says especially when they are not true. I took all the rumours as Chinese whispers even though I got some weird and odd reactions from a few close friends. Now, my male colleague wasn’t having it. He decided to set the record straight and I believe that did the trick. Then he came to me and asked me why I wasn’t concerned about the rumors after all I was a married woman and that sort of rumour could hurt my marriage. I am going to tell you what I told him,
‘I am an adult with adult problems and I don’t think I should waste my time on people’s thoughts about me. I am not a teenager approaching puberty with her emotions and feelings all twisted up. Yes! I live in a world where people need constant validation but I also live in a world where serial killers are soccer moms and youth empowering leaders. Does that mean that the positive perception they force your minds to have about them is right? Nope! As long as we live in a world filled with uncertainties, your perception about me will do nothing for me and my perception about you will do nothing for you’ …..When you think about what I said, I am right about how powerful a positive perception can also be.
You can choose to clarify the negative perception people have about you if you believe that you can’t afford any losses in this small selfish world or you can choose to live your life like people’s perception about you does not and will never matter because you know exactly who you are.
See how powerful perceptions are…
Photo Credit: Erniesha Tibs.
About the Writer: Erniesha Tibs is a wife, a fashion lover and Reality/Personal Blogger. I am in my mid-twenties and currently doing my second degree. My passion for fashion runs in so deep that I decided to have my own fashion store and I call it ‘Tibs Wears’. I am also passionate about my blog which talks about anything and everything…from my personal life experiences to life as it actually is. Running a business, being a wife, updating my blog daily, being a student is not everything that is to this girl. I strongly believe in respecting people. RESPECTING OTHERS is what got me this far in Life. follow me on instagram @ernieshatibs. Links – www. everydaytibs.blogspot.com and www.facebook.com/Everydaytibs
