It is just two months to your day; the day you will tell your partner those words that would for a lifetime tie you to them but you are having jitters and your feet are cold and you ask yourself, ”Am I ready?” Wedding jitters are normal for couples going down the aisle but you have to be sure it is not jitters for something else that might be lacking in your relationship. With the rate of divorce and more singles choosing to remain single on the rise, saying “I DO” in hope for a lasting relationship has to mean more than it meant some decades ago. So how would couples in a relationship or personally know that they\you are ready to walk down the aisle?
1. You can handle two or more people’s needs: There are some exceptional cases where the couple learnt that marriage is not just about selfishly meeting their personal needs alone but enlarging their capacity to meet their new family’s needs too. But now, you are reading this article so make sure that financially, mentally, emotionally and physically, you are at a place where you can handle your new family’s needs. A good way of testing that is to see how responsive you are to other people’s hardship.
2. You have gone beyond physical attraction in a relationship; you are connected emotionally, intellectually, spiritually too: Most relationships starts with meeting a person one is physically attracted to. Once the relationship kicks off, you have to try to move it beyond the physical attraction both of you feel. When you realize that you are emotionally, intellectually and spiritually connected to this person beyond your first physical attraction to each other, you may be ready.
3. If your significant other is your best friend and you realize that those you call best friends have become your partner’s best friends too and vice versa: First, you realize your significant other is the person you want to tell about the good and the bad times you have and then, you realize that his best friends are at least close to you or have become your best friends too and vice versa. If marriage is about starting a new life, both of you have taken the required first step so you may be ready.
4. Commitment is not rooted in fear but in love: The reason why you are committed to your significant other is not rooted in fear of you growing too old without settling down or fear of you hurting her. It is completely rooted in the fact that he/she is the one you want to be with.
5. You are not looking for a better option: If you still feel there is a better option out there, please don’t take the leap. But if you recognize that there might be imperfections in your relationship but for you, there is no better relationship than that which you both share together, then you may be ready.
6. You want to be better for your significant other: If your partner does not motivate you with little or no words to become a better person, you are not ready to settle.
7. Both of you have the same values: When you agree with most of what your partner says concerning the future and long term goals, it shows that both of you probably have the same beliefs and are heading towards the same destination.
8. The issue of trust is not an issue because you know who your partner is and what they are capable of doing.
9. Sometimes your partner frustrates you and that does not change the fact that you still want to be with them:
10. When you realize that saying “I DO” is not to patch two separate lifestyles but to strengthen the life you already have together, you are ready.
Sounds sweet right? Cheesy too? Marriage can be a bed of roses where you prune the thorns if you are sure of most of the above. So ask yourself again, “Are you ready to say “I DO”?