Read more about Lagos State
- My colour: When you enter, you will first hear “my colour” from one guy with yellow teeth. The guy does not have a shop o. He has a friend that has a friend that has a shop and is looking for percentage. You see that compliment, you will pay for it o. That “my colour” is not free.
- Do not look: Listen! Do not look at interesting wares on your way to the shop you are headed to. Nigerian traders translate that to mean that you want to buy. If it is a cloth, they will tell you it suits you. They did it to me. I looked one of those bras the hangout and the woman said: “Oga, e go fit your wife”. I said I do not have one. She said “e go fit your babe” and I said I do not have one. She then said, “e go fit you sef o”…
- My second shop: This concept of “my second shop” is closely related to the first one. The owner of the shop does not have the product you want but knows someone or two who may have it. But telling you he does not have it may take you to another shop hence costing him a customer. So that other shop becomes his “second shop” and he makes his money anyway. Note the owner of the other shop is in on it. That’s why they all cluster together to sell a certain category 0f wares.
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- Pickpockets: Every day is a good day for these guys. Try not to use your neck too much. If you show your fascination with the chaos, too much, they will know you are a JJC (Johnny just come) and you will become a target. You will be wise to hold your phone, purse or wallet in your hands because the pocket that will confound a Lagos pickpocket is yet to be made. It is their job because they do it well.
- The best things/prices are deep in the heart of the market: If you are keen on getting the best prices, avoid the ones you see at the entrance and go into the hearty of jungle… sorry, market. The best things are in there and the best prices too. That is where value for money lives. You will know you are close when you see them in clusters according to what they sell. Also, you would hear “na mumu dey go boutique”.
- Go with someone who knows the place: While this would not solve all your problems, you will be saving yourself the hassle of knowing where to look. This does not say you won’t lose your things to the guys we described in number 4. Like we say in Pidgin, “who dey ask question no dey miss road”.
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