Are you currently bored in your relationship? Or just simply unhappy?
I have good news for you. You are not alone! Most couples have their off-seasons; that moment when the relationship feels more like a chore and less like a loving connection between two people.
Like most long-term commitments – a career, for example – it’s easy to lose your morale or the passion that started it all in the first place. We ladies easily fall prey to this, considering how emotional we can get, thanks to our natural wiring. I think most ladies will also agree with me on this next point: my man’s low morale can end up affecting mine as well, if I sense it – because of this same emotional wiring. That is why keeping your morale high is a must, especially if you treasure the relationship.
From a female perspective, here are a few tips to help you gentlemen when things get a bit dull in your relationship:
1. Remind yourself that it’s not all about the “passion”: In my opinion, we all need to get to a place where we stick to things we’ve set our hearts and minds on, even when the going gets tough. Yes, sparks of romance aren’t flying in the background, and the excitement has gone dim, but you made a decision to commit to me. As long as you and I are not being emotionally or physically hurt, be determined to endure this rough patch which should end soon if handled well.
2. Let me know how you feel: Please remember that I’m not a mind reader. If you’re bored in the relationship, or feel your needs are not being met, please let me know politely. As a couple, it’s important we sit down every once in a while to assess the progress of our relationship and air out our grievances so we know what needs to be eliminated or re-worked. Communication is key, and if done properly, it’ll certain help us reach the compromise that’ll satisfy us both.
3. Spark up the romance: A wise man once said: “You’re not a tree. If you don’t like where you are, move!” In most cases, we lose our morale in relationships because we’ve stopped doing the things that got us this far in the first place. Set things in motion by doing those fun activities you did at the early stages of our relationship – sweet surprises, frequent dates, etc.
4. Speak to someone: This rule must be used very cautiously as there’s nothing worse than finding out about our business from a stranger. Sometimes, speaking to a trusted person who’s older and wiser – preferably not your mother – would help to get an outsider’s perspective on what’s missing in our relationship. Your mother and other family members are likely to take your side, and that won’t help us get to the root of our issues as a couple.
5. Ladies, play your part too: On a final note, I understand that I must give encouragement and be receptive to your ideas to spark up the relationship. My advice to female readers is to put in the needed effort to make things work from our end as well. Let’s strive to be patient, co-operative and understanding as the uncomfortable and dull phases come and go.
These rules are stepping stones to retrieving the joy you once had in your relationships. Use them and watch your relationship bloom once again.
What do you think? Kindly share your thoughts in the comments section below.
About the Writer: Ify Halim is a young Creative and a promoter of values through the force that is writing. Follow her on twitter @MissHalim.
