Having to say No to people can be a pretty big deal for me because I really don’t like to let anyone down. I would say Yes and later have to reconsider on my own and come up with an excuse why I couldn’t make it or do it. Sometimes I do it at my own expense which totally turns out to be an inconvenience for me. Now most people go with the “I can’t give you an answer right now, will you check back with me”? It just means you are considering saying yes but need to check on your itineraries first, which is fine, but don’t say that just to put off saying ‘NO’. That could make you come off looking bad. You can actually be a good person telling someone you can’t go somewhere or do something they ask you to. It doesn’t make you a bad person to say you can’t do something. Besides, going out of your way sometimes doesn’t end up well for either party.
A friend of mine asked me to come for a get together for her birthday, but the timing was off for me as I had work the next day plus an unfinished work I had to complete very early the next morning. She persisted, however, and of cause the usual me didn’t want to let her down so I agreed. Fast forward to the end of the story; I lost my phone that night and haven’t stopped regretting going. Of course I went to work the next day moody, and didn’t achieve much that day. Moral of the story; if I just jejely said No babe I can’t go, this would have been avoided.
All am saying in a nutshell is, rather than inconvenience yourself because you’re trying not to offend people, why not just kindly say No. Rather than:
“I know someone else that could…”
“My granny broke her hip…”
“Let me think about it…”
All of these are good reasons if they are true, but what if they aren’t and the person gets to know. It makes you look bad even though what you intended to do was politely decline. Just say NO, and let it be NO, and let your Yes be Yes. In the long run, the person would appreciate your honesty and would value your decision, because they know that if you say you’re going to do something, you definitely will.
Have you had a similar experience where you would have preferred saying NO but said yes? Was it worth it? Kindly share with us and drop your suggestions and opinions.
