Being in the friend zone hurts as hell. It is a pretty bad place to be yet anyone who claims to have truly loved and eventually lost has at one time or another been placed in the zone. So if you perceive that you have been friend-zoned, stop hoping against all hope that the situation might change. Even if the situation changes, you will be selling yourself short. Most times, your attempt to force affection from the other person eventually leads to the loss of trust and the great friendship you already have.
We all deserve someone who would love us deeply and who we can love back deeply. So don’t settle. If they cannot love you as you deserve to be loved, don’t force them. If they won’t accept your beautiful love, don’t waste it. Find and wait for that one whom it would make the best sense with.
So ladies – and gentlemen, here are 3 tips to get you out of the friend zone:
1. Make your intentions clear: So you’d like him to be more than a friend but he keeps bringing his relationship sob stories to you? How can you keep allowing that happen to him when you care that much about him? Tell him straight away that it breaks your heart when he comes crying to you because of his sad relationship. Tell him you would like to see that he does not hurt that way any more.
On a day when he is feeling better and he is out with you, tell him without mincing words how you feel about him. He may be shocked but in the very least, he would know he’ll be crossing his boundaries by bringing his relationship sob stories to you and at most, you may get lucky and he’ll see you as you want to be seen by him.
2. Don’t let them use you: Once you have made your intentions clear, put a firm foot on the ground against listening to their sad relationship turnout stories. Now that they know you care about them, they might want to take advantage of that in their low moments but if you have one of those who cherish the friendship you both have, they’ll let you know as soon as they can if they feel something in return for you or not.
3. Have a life: Now that you are sure that you have been put in the zone, you need to have a life away from them. If you’ve been spending 60% of your time with them and the other 40% of your time for everything else, now is the time for you to reverse the percentages. Give them 40% and spend the 60% on other things. As reality keeps dawning on you that what you have with them is strictly friendship, you can reduce your time with them gradually so you can have more time to build new relationships.
Word of advice: Don’t stay in the zone too long. Find out where you stand with them and take appropriate measures. Until they are yours, they are not yours. Don’t settle.
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