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The eyes are one of the most powerful organs in human sub-communication. A popular quote even describes them as “the window to the soul”. Looking at someone in a certain manner sends signals of emotions you feel about them. Holding good eye contact helps build trust in your relationship with people and this makes it of crucial importance when it comes to managing people.  For instance, American politician, Bill Clinton is famous for having amazing eye contact. There are tons of people who have commented that when he looked at them, they felt like the only “person in the room”. This charm might be what won him the presidency in the past.

Seeing how impactful this fundamental tool of human communication can be in one’s life, here are some tips for cultivating good eye contact.

Avoid The Creepy Gaze

The creepy gaze in this context refers to eye contact that is held longer than is required. Good eye contact should be held at minimal intervals with short breaks in between. When in conversation with someone, you may hold eye contact for at least 10 seconds, look elsewhere, and then return your gaze back to that person. Gazing at someone for far too long in a casual conversation can cause uneasiness and give off wrong signals

Make Everyone Feel At Home

Audience are generally more in tune with speakers who give them their undivided attention. It shows that they have their best interests at heart and are willing to invest time in them. When it comes to public speaking, eye contact is without a doubt highly essential. It encourages deeper engagement with the audience and ensures that they connect with the speaker. When speaking to multiple people or a group, try not to concentrate on one person for too long. You should move around constantly keeping short gazes with different members of the group. By doing this, you ensure that no one feels left out and everyone is carried along.

 Let your eyes speak   

We are creatures of emotions and so, our facial expressions are supposed to interpret the emotions we feel but unfortunately, some individuals deal with the inability to express themselves coherently. To become more expressive you can practice showing more emotions. A good option is to join a drama group. Acting improves your expressiveness and helps you convey your emotion more aptly. You can also practise expressing yourself in front of the mirror until you see a change in your demeanour.



If you struggle with making eye contact, you can practise by deliberately making eye contact with people around you.  You don’t have to do this to an extreme but friendly gaze with colleagues, acquaintances, friends, and even strangers can go a long way in helping you become at ease with making eye contact. This is especially helpful for people who have difficulty making eye contact due to their shyness. Remember, practice makes perfect.

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This article was first published on 19th February 2019


My name is Samuel Okoruwa. I am an ardent researcher, reading is life and writing is fun.

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