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You may have heard of the story of the young boy who had wings to fly but never did because he was not sure the wings were as strong as the ones used by the birds in flying.

This could be you.

No, I am not saying you are a young boy and I am not saying you have wings to fly. But you may be acting in the same way in other areas of your life. When you hold yourself back from taking action or when you express a lack of confidence in your ability to get something done, you are just like the young boy. This simple act is called self-doubt.

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Self-doubt manifests or is expressed in several ways but the most common ones are low self-esteem, self-sabotage, impostor syndrome, and self-isolation. Whatever way you manifest yours, you need to know that your self-doubt has its roots in your mindset. You are more likely to self-doubt yourself when you have a fixed mindset in an area of your life than when you have a growth mindset. And just like you can improve your mindset from a fixed mindset to a growth mindset, you can also overcome self-doubt. Below are 4 tips on how you can do this.

Stop Comparing Yourself With Others

One of the primary ways self-doubt arise is through comparing yourself to others. You are not the other, so why compare? The only person you should be comparing yourself with is the person you were yesterday. Any other person you are comparing yourself to is you dealing a heavy blow on yourself. This is because, the realities of the other person are not the same as yours, even if you two are twin.

Keep a Record Of Your Wins

Keeping a record of your past wins could also help you overcome your self-doubt. Reminding yourself that you have achieved something worthwhile in the past could provide you with the needed mental energy to take action when and where needed.

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To develop a habit of keeping a record of your past wins. You can keep a mental record of this but it is best you keep a journal for this.

Practice Positive Self-Talk

We all self-talk. It is now a question of what quality of talk you have with yourself. I always tell people, that you are the only person who will be staying with yourself for the rest of yourself. So you must ensure that the kind of talks you engage with yourself is the kind of talks that will help you take action and not doubt yourself. When self-doubting thoughts come to your mind, reframe them by offering yourself a more positive thought to think on.

Let Go Of Past Mistakes And Failure

Mistakes and failures are part of life. When you do not have a healthy perspective on failures and mistakes, you are likely to self-doubt yourself. John Maxwell put forward a better way to look at failure in his book, Sometimes You Win, Sometimes You Learn.

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The highest reward for our toil is not what we get for it but what we become by it… Mistakes are not failures. They are proof that we are making an effort. When we understand that, we can more easily move out of our comfort zone, try something new, and improve…. Improvement demands a commitment to grow long after the mood in which it was made has passed.

Face Your Fears

Fear is that crippling thought that holds you and keeps you focused on the often un-existent obstacles. When you allow fear to take hold of you, you will self-doubt. From experience, the best way to deal with fear is to face the fear.

Closing Thoughts

Self-doubt is one of the many ways you may be limiting yourself. While you may appear to have a ready reason for you to self-doubt yourself, you will realize at the end of the day that you have simply shot yourself in the legs.

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This article was first published on 12th May 2022

victor-ifegwu-mbonu

Ifegwu-Mbonu Victor is a Personal Growth and Leadership Trainer who provides training and coaching to individuals and organizations.

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