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‘It’s not you, it’s me,’ is a beautiful line that is now perceived as a spell of doom especially in relationships. In reality, it doesn’t necessarily absorb you of the blame. Arguing against this grain of wheat in other to validate its authenticity is on principle, just against my viewpoint.  Of course, it has to be you, yes, you.  There were things you probably should have fixed, but you kept skipping. How to Take Responsibility of Your Life: Learn to speak your truths even if its hurts: A lot of us, are against standing up and owning up to self-truths.  Truths about yourself, you know no one will tell you. Like, “I am beautiful”. If you do not believe yourself even after several confessions, get a friend to do you the favor. Become socially involved: The potential of connecting with another human being is just too exhilarating to pass up.  Do not give up on your friends or social life by moping. Go out, have fun, avoid sitting all alone to prevent self-depression. Learn About Yourself: Use this period to learn about yourself, a lot of people are used to doing things with their peer groups or in pairs. Get up there and know you. Take up a cooking class, personal development aid, go learn driving, drop by at that gym center near you. Through these, you get to know the other side of you, you did not know existed. Find the Fun you, you forgot about long ago. Ladies, Stop Searching: Lot of ladies end up chasing one who is against their values and codes.  If they have to be chased they do not want you. I promise there is nothing wrong with you, neither are you the only one on this planet who isn’t in pairs. Live, Love Life.

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This article was first published on 30th July 2017


Adepeju Adenuga is a writer (considering where you are reading this, makes perfect sense). She holds a Masters Degree in Literature in English from the University of Lagos.

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