As humans, we all have expectations about different things in our lives. These expectations, more than anything else in life, determine your reality because they pattern your thoughts and actions.
This means that when you want to achieve goals, if you don’t believe you’ll succeed, you won’t because every step towards success starts with your mind. Unconsciously, these expectations are developed as you grow up.
This is because many of these expectations you have you don’t even know about them as they are typically modeled after parents, authority figures, and different life experiences.
Expectations can be healthy and some can be unhealthy as well. These healthy expectations can be good and encourage you to overcome obstacles and chase your dreams.
You’ll know your expectations are healthy when they are:
On the other hand, when your expectations are unrealistic and unhealthy, it can create friction, misunderstandings, frustration, and more.
These unhealthy expectations can be dangerous to our mental health, those around us and our general well-being as well.
Additionally, if you have unrealistic expectations, you might find yourself putting in a lot of effort with little to show for it.
Sometimes, people quit relationships, jobs, and churches over unmet expectations, often expectations that were never realistic in the first place.
It is important to examine yourself to access your values and beliefs and decide if you have unrealistic expectations.
Loss of Self-Confidence
One of the dangers of unrealistic expectations is the loss of self-confidence. When you find yourself with unrealistic expectations, which are difficult to attain, chances are that you will feel frustrated and angry.
Meeting these expectations might not be your fault, however, it is simply because the goals are just unrealistic. And sometimes, you might feel inferior because you’re not able to achieve these goals.
All of these tend to reduce your self-confidence and at some point, you become unsatisfied with your results, thereby relenting in your efforts.
Unrealistic expectations come with self-disappointment because these expectations or goals are unattainable. That means when you set goals and can’t achieve the disappointment can become unbearable and dangerous to your well-being.
The problem with unrealistic expectations is not that you will never achieve anything or that you are incompetent or lazy; the problem lies within your struggle to take pride in any kind of accomplishment.
This means that you will continually feel dissatisfied and disappointed and will continue to play down your self-perception.
Chances of Ruining Relationships
With unrealistic expectations, you begin to feel you do have enough potential in yourself to meet your expectations.
When this happens, you might become irritable and even reserved and this behavior affects your relationship with people around you.
In worse scenarios, this behavior completely changes your attitude and in return, you might push worse unrealistic expectations on people around you as well.
And if you continue pushing your loved ones or those around you, you’ll be the one who has ruined this relationship because you set goals that you can’t achieve for yourself, and made your partner humiliated and exhausted with too high expectations.
Reduces Motivation and Enthusiasm
One of the best ways to increase your motivation and enthusiasm is by setting feasible goals and achieving them one after the other.
However, when your goals are unrealistic and your expectations are extremely high, soon you’ll lose the desire to proceed with achieving any of the goals.
Generally, motivation and enthusiasm do not tolerate overstrain and cumbersome supervision.
In conclusion, it’s not always easy to adjust your expectations given that your expectations won’t change overnight.
However, if you work on it, over time you’ll see the progress you’ve been working on and this can bring enormous benefits and a renewed sense of peace.Featured Image Source: The Guardian Nigeria
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